Beautiful Poem

This poem is stunning. Just wanted to share it. It is used in the Reform Jewish liturgy, as an optional reading, before Kaddish

”Every once in a while, a poem or song is so well constructed, so clearly conveys the authors meaning and is so precisely expressive that it becomes something of an anthem. The poem below, Epitaph, was written by Merrit Malloy and as one of those poems, has become a staple of funeral and memorial services…for good reason.”

Epitaph – By Merrit Malloy

When I die
Give what’s left of me away
To children
And old men that wait to die.
And if you need to cry,
Cry for your brother
Walking the street beside you.
And when you need me,
Put your arms
Around anyone
And give them
What you need to give to me.

I want to leave you something,
Something better
Than words
Or sounds.
Look for me
In the people I’ve known
Or loved,
And if you cannot give me away,
At least let me live on in your eyes
And not your mind.

You can love me most
By letting
Hands touch hands,
By letting bodies touch bodies,
And by letting go
Of children
That need to be free.
Love doesn’t die,
People do.
So, when all that’s left of me
Is love,
Give me away.

First Steps

Only a handful of people know about my journey with Covid.
I just want to say this .. I don’t “deserve” this and this isn’t “what I’ve been asking for” and I’m not here to have anyone say “I told you so’ .
This has been tough but you know what I’ve found òut? I’ve found out that I’ve worked so hard so much but when I couldn’t work, my team came through for me in ways that j couldn’t have expected.
I’ve found peace during the storm, comfort from people that I didn’t expect as well as silence from ones I expected to hear from.
I’ve fought hard to get my body where I wanted it to be and, those that really know me, know this isn’t what I expected from my body but this means I have to slow down and listen to my body and to my soul in ways that I am haven’t done in a long time.
I’ve pushed myself.. but I’ve also pushed away others.. I’ve pushed God to the back burner because I’ve been hurt by people….
Well, this Covid journey has bought me back to God in ways that I can’t quite explain .. I have never been much of a ‘worrier” and I’ve just let go and let God take the wheel and I’ve been at peace ..
I really have… There’s been pain.. sleepless nights… Many falls… But I just keep getting back up and stepping out .. pulling on my boots, so to speak.

I wouldn’t wish Covid on my worst enemy… and come to think of it.. I don’t think I really have any ‘enemies” although I’m pretty sure that there’s people that couldn’t care one way or another if I’m still around… But you know what?
This Covid journey has shown me how blessed I am…. Before my husband, Greg Mead , could come home to me for a week.,. my daughter, Kateley Lyons , took care of me.. my sons, Gregory Mead and Hunter Mead had to pick me up and carry me from the bed, to the kitchen and to the bathroom
I’ve felt the love and prayers from so many people…
I didn’t “deserve” Covid .. but yes. I did dance at the music on the square… I did love on my bundles and my girls.. I did go out to dinner and lunch and breakfast…. I did go to work and massage my clients… I did go to Legends Fit and workout with my trainer. Phu Lam ..

I lived and I loved., And I don’t regret any of that.. because I made memories

Beautiful, sacred. Wonderful memories… And I’m still making them.
I’m making time to heal my body, nourish my soul and this journey with Covid has taught me some powerful, profound lessons that I know I needed to be learn
So maybe I didn’t “deserve” this.. but I’m determined to find the good in all things and to make the best of the situation I’m in
I’ll be back at Rockwall Body and Soul Massage as soon as I can walk up all those stairs
Thank you so much for your prayers..
I will always remember the prayers that soothed my soul while I was on this journey.

Natural Woman

I’m sharing these words written by Ruthie Cole , because while I’m still on my journey with Covid.. I am fully aware of how blessed I am and determined to take even better care of my body and my soul.

“Oh hi this is your friendly reminder that natural immunity to COVID exists*; ignoring natural immunity is ethically, medically, and scientifically wrong, and informed consent is the bedrock of medical practice.

There are a whole lot of unvaccinated immune people who present a COVID threat to no one.

Language that says that any person is the enemy rather than the virus itself is reprehensible and should be condemned.

*Despite what some have claimed, there are over a dozen studies demonstrating that natural immunity is as strong if not better than vax immunity. Happy to share references if you need them.”

I’ve felt that certain people have judged decision and others have chosen to avoid me because of my choices. That’s okay. because as I’ve learned I’m not meant for everyone and everyone isn’t meant to be my friend, my client, my circle. That’s why I see treasure the ones that are. Down the line, in a few years time or sooner. We will learn more about the vaccinations. Let’s just be kind and walk with Love…

In My Daughters Eyes

I’m doing my physical therapy and this song comes on and almost brings me to tears… “In my daughter’s eyes. I’m strong and wise and know no fear”

This is how I want my girls and bundles to see me.. as strong and wise and fearless and loving and kind….
I haven’t been very strong lately and that is about to change but I hope I taught them compassion and understanding while I was weak and showed them how to do live unafraid.

This Covid journey is teaching me so much…. #walkwithlove

Not My Words .(but my thoughts)

I’m not a nurse but I’m friends with many. just as I’m friends with several doctors… This is very well written.

I remember being taught in nursing school the rights of medication administration – 1.Right patient, 2. right medication, 3. right dose, 4. right route, 5. right time, 6. right documentation, 7. right situation 8. Right place and 9. RIGHT TO REFUSE.

I also remember my nursing instructor stressing how important number 9 is and that we as nurses have a duty to ensure that the right to refuse any medical care or medication is honored and upheld. To advocate for our patients and protect them. Protect them from what you may ask? To protect them from other medical professionals and “people” who think they can bully, manipulate, control and dominate any patient to force a medication, procedure or any type of medical care.

And wouldn’t you know that this RIGHT to refuse has been what I have had to defend more than anything? As an RN of more than a decade, I will forever support the right to choose and also the right to REFUSE any form of medical care. I can’t believe anyone feels that mandates of any form of medicine or medical practice or procedure is acceptable. Even more shocked that some nurses and NURSE LEADERS feel this is acceptable after a career of fighting for, defending and advocating for our patients rights.

Forced healthcare is NOT healthcare and I stand for the freedom this country was founded on. I have stood for my patients right to choose. And now that nurses and other healthcare workers rights are being threatened, I stand for their right to choose as well. COERCION is not CONSENT.
*For anyone thinking medical mandates are because the government(and their programs) care for you and your health and safety, you should definitely brush up on history and how the Nazis exterminated over 6million Jews #yesitisthesamething #medicalfreedom #stopthemandate #holdtheline #foreveranadvocate #ProtectYourChildren

New Mercies

Morning by morning, new mercies I see

This is an old gospel song that my Mema used to try to teach me-the deaf one- to carry the tune to. I can’t carry the tune, but I do know every word.. and it feels so good to listen and sing along…

New mercies, indeed, last night I walked across my bathroom and into my closet-42 steps-slowly, purposefully, and not gracefully but I did and this morning, I did it again, walking to the sink to the closet.. slowly, gratefully, mindful.

Step by step… Then I come to bed again to drink my coffee and do my quiet time and the first verse I read is this one from Luke… “You must be merciful, just as Your Father in Heaven is merciful” and I had to find the song that immediately came to mind…. Great is Thy Faithfulness… and share my thoughts and my gratitude.

Mercy-compassion has been shown to me in such incredible ways . My old friend, Susan Gamez Balderas , has been giving me magnetic massage therapy sessions that I believe have helped me get back to walking, my trainer, Phu Lam , has modified sessions and given me confidence reach day…. He’s so compassionate and patient with me and every session with him makes me stronger..

Mercy and compassion …
My daughter, Kateley Lyons , didn’t tell me this but Susan did… During my hardest days when I was so weak and sick, she put her arms around me and walked me outside to get treatment. She showed great love… When I asked her about it, she said ,”Momma, l learned from Mema and Meme and you!”

That’s what we do .. We show mercy and compassion and love because our Father does and because of all the people that are watching us.

May we be examples..
Great is Thy Faithfulness… New mercies I see!

Part of the Journey

Yesterday I went back to my beloved 925 and gave a massage.
. It was different… I used a walker to get my client and to get from one room to the other but I leaned on the table to do the massage, and I used the stool far more than before but I was able to do the work I love, and my soul felt so good .
I’ve always said that massage isn’t what I do, it is who I am… a toucher, a healer, an empath, and while I worked on my client-one that’s been coming to me since 2009- I found myself feeling such peace and purpose.

I’ve got a long way to go… But with God all things are possible.. and Phu Lam is a huge part of this journey with me.

By the time Greg Mead gets back, I’ll be dancing again… and chasing after my bundles and my girls!

I couldn’t have made it without my tribe… . My sons that’s aren’t on Facebook and my daughter, Kateley Lyons that took care of me and are still taking care of me .
Laura Bjeles and Shelby Waters at Rockwall Body and Soul Massage … My 925 partner, Cari Foote , and all the many, many prayers of friends ,family and clients.

Life is indeed better with boots on… As the shirt by Chasity Watson of Upstream Dreams Creatives declares . and I’m pulling my boots back on and giving a “hallelujah” to God for making all this possible!

The texts, the messages, the cards, the food… The Love I’ve felt during this journey has been enlightening and sacred.. it has taught me so much.. I knew I needed to learn more.. and I’m so grateful that I’m getting a chance to do what I love and love more!

walkwithlove #writingmyheartout #jeannasoul

Great Date

I went on an amazing date last night with a perfect gentleman in Rockwall.
He held my door open, offered his hand and walked me inside… when the waiter at The Roundabout – Rockwall, Texas showed us our table, he pulled out my chair and had me sit first.

He was a great conversationalist and asked me all kinds of questions and genuinely listened to what I said

He made a special effort to look nice and didn’t just wear shorts and flip flops to dinner, because going out to dinner has always been a little bit special.
He made me feel absolutely beautiful and was proud to be seen with me.
I was treated like a lady all evening by him and he even asked if we can go out on another date real soon!
I think I’m going to see if he’ll like to go dancing with me tonight at San Jacinto Music Series – The SEAM and I have a feeling he will!

Dangerous Woman

She’s been called many things

For many reasons

Making a stand for what she believes

Seems to make her a dangerous woman

Isn’t that a crying shame?

She isn’t afraid to walk the line

Make her own path

Stand out from the crowd

Speak her mind

Dance to her own beat

She’s kicked the assumptions to the curb

Let go of all expectations

Figured out who to trust and who to watch

She sees the danger

That others don’t

Believes in living her life unlike most

She’s a dangerous woman

Because she doesn’t fall in line

Doesn’t obey rules and regulations that are man-made

She’s dangerous because she speaks her mind

Because she doesn’t simply comply

She’s strong enough to know she who she is

and danger is her friend

Jeanna’ Mead

7 22 a m. July 19,2021

Banjos and Me

Yesterday morning as I was driving up Goliad, this music came on..
Dueling banjos.. and I began tapping my fingers against the steering wheel and suddenly felt the tears roll down my face… because I was so enjoying the music and could just imagine the guys smiling and laughing as they played against each other and for each other at the same time.
I loved this music so much that I pulled over into the parking lot just to listen to it again with my full attention… and then I sent the Spotify link to a few people.
One of them sent a text back, “that is beautiful… but how do you hear that?”
I explain this so often to people… My hearing loss is unique, kinda like my personality, kinda like everyone else … I hear percussion, miss the wind pipes, I hear the music and can’t understand the lyrics, I can catch sarcasm and miss the question, I will hear the birds but have no idea what direction they are coming from, I hear the children laughing, the leaves rustling, the can popping open, but I feel the person walk up behind me, and I feel the presence of someone next to me but I can’t understand a word they say unless I read their lips.
I know the tune of many songs because I was raised in a house filled with music but I can’t carry a tune to save my life… but I can tell if you are singing it wrong! 😉

I can hear men’s voices better than women’s, can listen to Johnny, Waylon and Willie all day long… and I can dance on beat without any issues at all… but I can’t tell when the music pauses if it’s at “normal” volume and I can’t understand a movie without captions.
I can’t hear the water dripping in the sink, but I do hear the toliet flush…
I heard the kindness in the voice of the barista at Starbucks just as clearly as I heard the disdain of the woman at the store that was upset that I didn’t hear her ask me to move.
As I explained to my friend, I added this.. “I hear more than you think I do and less than I want to,” but I got to thinking… maybe I really hear what is meant for me to hear… like the amazing sound of dueling banjos!

I hope y’all will listen to this turned up full blast and tell me how it made your day a little brighter, too! #jeannasoul #musicandmassage
https://open.spotify.com/track/6kktMeJWb4K8DMVsS0wtsk?si=7akQCoSsRSO85PQ16FMc1g&utm_source=copy-link&dl_branch=1