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So Good

Yesterday I stepped inside

My special space

Felt the peace I always receive

But then I got more than I expected

So good

From so far

A letter containing dollar bills

Signed from someone who knew

What I was going through

Wildflower shoots blooming through

In places where I had scattered seeds

Just like confetti

A dark chocolate bar saved for a day such as this

It’s all so good

I stepped away

And shut the door

Left part of my heart

While the rest of me was tickled pink

By how so good things could be.

๐Ÿ‘ฃ๐Ÿงก Jeanna’ Mead

8.11 a.m. 3.31.20 http://www.JeannaSoul.com

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Crazy Times

She never thought the day would come

That the doors would have to be shut

Keeping her from doing what she loves

But it’s crazy times just now

What she does isn’t deemed “essential”

And she knows damn well it’s not quite true

That’s just like beauty

In the eye of the beholder

Crazy to believe it anyways

But she aches to touch

Aches to be touched

Misses the music and the lyrics

The good vibes

The scent of coconut oil on her hands

The feel of another person’s skin

She misses the pulse she feels, the rise and fall of breath

She longs to be needed,to fill the void

To step up and press down

Give her all and get more

It’s crazy how she knows

What to do and when and where to go

But right now

These crazy times

Are keeping her

From doing what she loves

So she’ll make do

In other ways

Hold her breath

Find the treasures

On the ragged edges

And make it through

These crazy times

Until she can do what she was born to do.

๐Ÿ‘ฃ๐Ÿงก Jeanna’ Mead

3.31.20. 6 46 a.m

http://www.jeannasoul.com

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Crazy Daisies

She would rather have

Crazy Daisies in pitchers

Or Mason jars

Instead

She would rather have

Tequila and whiskey

Instead

She would rather be picked up

Taken for a ride

In blue jeans and barefeet

Instead

She would rather receive

A simple bracelet

Handwritten card

Instead

She would rather have

Chocolate kisses

Instead

She would rather be

Taken out for burgers and beer

A little live music somewhere

Instead

She would rather be

Kissed again and again

Instead

She would just wait and see

What will be

Instead

Jeanna’ Mead

6 23 a.m. 2.13.20

http://www.jeannasoul.com

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She Will Live

Only a handful of people know how hard the last few years have been.

I’ve held it together pretty damn well.

I’ve learned so much about who I am, who I was and who I will be.

I’ve discovered my real friends and found out who wasn’t.

I’ve found out how to surrender and how to let go, when take the reins and when to let them loose.

I’ve given and I’ve received.

I’ve broken rules, stepped over boundaries, thrown out lifelines and caught a few myself.

I’ve fallen.

I’ve gotten up.

I’ve came real close to losing everything and real close to making it great.

I’ve made my share of mistakes. I trusted when I shouldn’t have and I’ve ignored my own instincts when I should have trusted those even more.

I’ve made lists..way too many of them.. Filled with things j wanted to do but not of things I’ve actually done.

One great friend told me it was time to quit writing and start doing and he promised to make damn sure.

Then I began to find others that I could trust and that believed in what I was.

That’s a game changer.

I’ve slept alone and I’ve slept Tangled in sheets with others. I’ve slept on massage tables, couches and beds but I want to sleep outside under the stars, in a cabin, on the deck, and while sunbathing on a boat. I want to sleep in beautiful lingerie and with nothing on my skin and in flannel PJs that smell of campfire smoke.

I want to make love more and make love differently.

Making love isn’t the same as having sex. It’s an intimate act that is of the mind and soul not just the body.

A few years ago, I had read the quote, “Make More Love” and I printed out 60 cards with those words.

When I handed them to clients, some would blush, some would wink and flirt and some would break my heart.

One woman grabbed my hand, collapsed into my arms and after crying said, “I haven’t made love in 20 years”

I held her. Then she said.” That’s why I come to you.. It feels like you’re making love to me in a sense. You’re the only one that touches my face, that touches my back, that sees my scars and it’s all I have.”

When she left, I cried for her.

That’s making love. That’s what I want to do more of.

I don’t want one more year to disappear into thin air with nothing to show for it.

That’s why…. This year, I’m going to LIVE.

I’m going to say “YES!”

I’m going to dance.

I’m going to invite and accept invitations.

I’m going to push the limits, jump over the lines, cross the boundaries and break the rules beautifully, deliberately and well.

Damn straight I am.. And maybe, just maybe you will, too

#Vision2020

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Mister Santa

Mister Santa

What do you know

What do you think

What goes on

Behind the scenes

Closed doors

Inside the hearts?

Who’s naughty and who’s nice?

Mister Santa

Do you check the list

Mark it twice?

Give gold stars

For extra effort?

Do you read between the lines

Or do you read minds?

Oh, Mister Santa

Is it true

That we only get

What we expect?

If I make a list

Will it be read?

Could I count on you, Mr Santa

Do you think I’ve been good?

I certainly try

Try again and again

I do my best

But then…

Oh, Mr Santa

Sometimes I slip

I sneak in

Chocolate kisses

When I shouldn’t

Skip a workout

That I should have done

I tell little white lies

Sweet talk a bit too much

I got caught flirting

Didn’t mean a thing

I had too much whiskey

And not enough to eat

I fell asleep

When I should have been listening

I forgot to meet a deadline

Got distracted by a story I was writing

Oh, goodness gracious, Santa

But I sure do I try

I give a little bit too much

Go a little crazy

From time to time

But, then again

I gotta live this

One wild and precious life

So, Mister Santa

Cut me some slack

Give a gal a break

I’m doing pretty good

Most always

And this is what I’ll like

If you’ll just pretty please

Have a little mercy on me

Dang gum dog did it again and again

Got into my lingerie

So I need more lace underthings

My cowboy boots are getting worn thin

God knows a gal can never have too many pairs

A red lipstick and a good pen

A steady clientele

Boxes of sheets in bright colors and every pattern

Salsa dance lessons

A flight across the sky

Turquoise stones

And hands to hold

Words on wood

And times with friends

Bottomless mimosas

Blueberry pancakes

After a night of dancing

Mr Santa, oh, what can I say

Let me explain

Most of what I want

Can’t be wrapped

Or placed underneath the tree

I’ll love to have some company

A walk on the wild side

To ride a horse on the beach

Grab a kayak and go for the day

Camp out under the stars

Cuddle up to stay warm

I’ll like to walk across the stage

Speak my mind about so many things

Get a few things lifted

Gray taken away

Maybe personal training is what I need

Oh, Mr Santa

What can I say?

I’m not no angel but, then again,

You could say the same

Most of the time

We are both

Trying our very best

Making a list

Checking it twice

We don’t pout

We don’t shout

We keep things light

And we jingle as we step

Once in a blue moon

Just once in a while

We might slip

But that’s alright

Because most of the time

Nine times out of ten

We do the best we can

Don’t you agree,Mr Santa, with me?

Jeanna’ Mead

12.15.19

7 53 a.m

http://www.jeannasoul.com

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Surrender Box

Surrender Box

BY MADISYN TAYLOR of DailyOM

A surrender box is a tool to help us to let go of our burdens so the universe can take care of them for us.

There are times when our minds become too full. Our to-do lists, worries, plans, and dreams may be so crowded together in our heads that we don’t have room to think.

We may believe that we are somehow taking care of our desires and concerns by keeping them at the forefront of our minds.

In maintaining our mental hold on every detail, however, we may actually delay the realization of our dreams and the resolution of our worries because we won’t let them go.

At times such as these, we may want to use a surrender box.

A surrender box allows us to let go of our worries and desires so the universe can take care of them for us.

We write down what we want or need to happen and then place the note into a box.

By writing and placing our thoughts in the box, we are taking action and letting the universe know we need help and are willing to surrender our feelings.

We give ourselves permission to not concern ourselves with that problem any longer and trust that the universe is taking care of it. You may even want to decorate your box and place it in a special place.

Your surrender box is a sacred container for your worries.

Not only do you free up space in your mind by letting go of our worries and desires and dropping them into your surrender box, but you are giving your burden over to a higher power. Once we drop our worries and desires into

the surrender box, we free our minds so we can be fully present in each moment.

Surrendering our worries and concerns and placing them in the hands of the universe doesn’t mean that we’ve given up or have been defeated.

Instead, we are releasing the realization of our desires and the resolution of our worries and no longer concerning ourselves with their outcomes.

It’s always fun to go back and pull the slips of paper out of the box once your requests have been granted.

And it’s amazing how quickly problems go away and dreams come true when we finally let go and allow a higher power to help us.

๐Ÿ‘ฃ๐Ÿ’™ These are not my words but I wanted to n place it here because it is such a beautiful gesture, such an act of trust

“I surrender all

All to Thee

My precious Saviour

I surrender all”

I can hear my Mema singing those lyrics, the Baptist hymnal in her hands as she tried to teach me to carry the tune along with her.

“I surrender all”

There’s something else when I give bodywork, I am so thankful for the ones that do surrender all, giving me their body and their soul, letting me work and trusting the process.

These are the ones that receive so much more because they are open n to the gift of healing touch.

I am learning to surrender my own body and soul, too, to receive as well as give.

Surrender isn’t waving a white flag, it’s opening up your heart and seeing what can happen if only you surrender your limitations.

I never learned to carry a tune by myself but when I surrender to another voice leading me, I can become part of the song.

I surrender all

๐Ÿ‘ฃ๐Ÿ’™ Jeanna’ Mead

615 a.m. 12.10.19

http://www.jeannasoul.com

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Safe Words

When it is time

To step inside

Shut the door

Do what must be done

I won’t bite my tongue

Clench my fist

Hold tight for what might happen

Keep the door cracked

Just a little

Because everything

Every little thing

Is gonna be alright

Hard to explain

How the past

Tries to break in

Cause some trouble

Raise some hell

Bring me back down

Where I don’t ever want to go again

When I think it’s all over

Locked safely away

It comes out

Tries to shatter my peace

But not now

Not anymore

I will whisper

The safe words

That have been engraved

Upon my heart

Etched into my skin

Worn upon my arm

Placed all over my walls

The words that keep me

Strong and fierce

Hunkydory

Fearless

Full of joy

Living my life

Falling in love

Dancing in the dark

Riding the waves

Flying free

Feeling with both hands

Reading chapter and verse

Making big plans

Giant steps

Leaps of faith

Dreaming big

Finding magic

In secret places

Discovering treasures

Hidden away

Now when I step inside

I’ll close the door

Delight in all I see

Do what I came for

Linger just a little longer

In this safe place

With all the words

I need.

๐Ÿ‘ฃโ™ฅ๏ธ

Jeanna’ Mead

643a.m 8.23.19

http://www.jeannasoul.com

When I decided to make the move to the Cade house, it was because of several signs that made me know it was meant to be.

One thing set me off, though, and my mind went straight down a path I didn’t want to go.

The commode closet is 4 feet wide by 4.5 feet deep with 10 feet ceilings. With white walls and white door, it was cold and inviting but more than that, it made me feel trapped. I had visions of someone turning off the lights, since the switch was outside the door, and placing a chair against the door knob so I couldn’t get out.

I shared this with a few people and they all laughed and assured me that no one would do that.

I was not convinced.

Every time I had to use the restroom,I would lock the door to the big room and leave the commode closet door open.

I couldn’t ease my mind.

Maybe it was irrational but it was my way of fighting my demons.

Then Tuesday my aunt Judy, and her daughter, Brandi and Brandi’s daughter, Mandana came into my new massage studio, carried bags and bags of treasures up the stairs and created a beautiful, sacred and safe place that bought me to squeals of pure joy and tears of happiness.

They spent the entire day and evening arranging and placing things perfectly, taking my gifts from clients and friends and putting them where I can see them and feel the love. They found paintings and pictures, pillows and silk scarves, baskets and wooden bowls, books and rocks and mixed the old with new.

Thift store finds mingled with handcrafted pieces from Europe.

Mexican shakers nestled in a bird cage.

Mirrors reflected pictures that had been painted of me that had been taken on days that I always remember as days that I felt known and loved.

A beautiful cut rock was placed next to a pitcher. They had no idea that the pitcher was a gift from a woman when I first opened my 203 Fannin location. Every time I look at that pitcher, I’m reminded of her gracious spirit.

Up on the fireplace ledge, was a little jade bird… It reminded me immediately of the song my Mema loved to sing.

“One, two, three like a bird I sing

Cause you’ve given me

The most beautiful set of wings”

It also reminded me that God has placed each person in my life for reasons and that there I am to love and live like an uncaged bird.

All these things, all the details in my massage room and even my closet meant so much but the biggest surprise was what they did to the commode closet.

They had blindfolded me… Something that took a level of trust in itself. Being unable to hear and unable to see is a step of faith for me.

They sat me down on the white throne and took off the blindfold and, just like that, my demon was slayed by the words and the art and the pictures that covered that 4 feet by 4.5 feet by 10 foot high commode closet.

Words of strength.

Words of faith.

Words that made me laugh.

Paintings by friends.

Pictures from my original studio.

Treasures from stores.

I could sit there and feel safe.

Known and loved.

They thought they were only decorating my place for me.

They did that, too.

But they really gave me the most beautiful set of wings.

They made this place safe and sacred.

They gave me what my soul needed, what I longed for, what I tried so hard to trust my Intuition for.

They took the words I had spoken and believed it mattered.

This is a gift beyond measure.

Known and loved.

I can fly.

Unafraid.

Thank you.

Thank you.

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4 o’clock cravings

She’s up at 4 in the morning

Couldn’t ignore the feeling any more

She needed something sweet

Something hot

Something to make it through

To stop the feeling

That woke her up too soon

She poured a cup of coffee

Added a bit of milk and made it sweet

Then reached for the cookies

Peanut butter and chocolate

Heaven help her

Cause she can’t help herself

When there’s a hunger burning inside her

All those good intentions and promises go right out the door

She vowed to make up for it

By doing twice as much

Working even harder

To counteract her 4 o’clock cravings

Lord knows she tries

But she’s only got one life

And if this is one of her vices

Well, heaven help her

Because she can’t help herself

She’ll drink every last drop

Lick her fingers till all trace is gone

Then slide back in

Between the sheets

Satisfied for the time being

Until she wakes up

Craving something else again.

๐Ÿชโ˜•โ™ฅ๏ธ๐Ÿ‘ฃ Jeanna’ Mead

4 27 a.m 7.14.19

http://www.jeannasoul.com