Ever since I read the beautiful words of Elizabeth Berg, I’ve been mulling over them, pondering what it means to hold on and to let go, and to do it with love -complete love.
I’ve spent a great deal of time sitting outside on my patio, listening to my soul and to my God.
Here’s some of the things that I’ve started to believe about holding on and letting go.
Sometimes, we hold on because we are afraid-of being alone,of being rejected,of the unknown and so, instead of holding on because of love, we are really holding on because of fear.
That’s not a good enough reason to hold on to anything-whether it’s a job,a relationship,or a home.
Other times,we hold on because of selfishness, the need to control,to claim something as “ours” and in doing so,sometimes we manipulate the situation,whether by shaming the other person,or sending them on a guilt trip;burdened by obligations and a misguided sense of honor.
Sometimes.though.we hold on because we believe,deeply and strongly, that holding on is the best thing we can do. We hold on to the past, and to the future-praying that the present times get better quickly
We hold on because we love so much that letting go feels like abandonment, but in reality,sometimes holding on is actually more like holding a prisoner captive; bond with unseen chains of burden and responsibility.
You may have them next to you,and they may physically be within reach,but their heart is a million miles away and they really can’t be touched where it matters the most.
That’s why I’ve began to realize something else-the other side of love -the love in letting go.
Letting go doesn’t mean you’ve lost, it means you’ve chosen to hold on to the goodness and the beauty before it turns rancid and ugly.
It’s loving enough to wish the best,not only for the one you love but also for yourself.
Letting go isn’t giving up or giving in, it’s purely giving love a chance,a golden opportunity to choose what the heart wants the most.
It’s a most precious gift, wrapped in tissue of tears, tied with ribbons of hope and given with an open heart.
It’s giving freedom…the freedom to keep the gift,return the gift,or exchange the gift.
It’s giving love to both.
I’ve always loved giving gifts almost as much as receiving gifts. I love the whole act of gifting-the search for it,wrapping it and waiting in anticipation for the right moment to give the gift.
So that’s why I think of letting go as one of the ultimate gifts of love.
Letting go with love honors yourself by saying “I’m worthy of true love” and it also gives respect and honor to the other person by acknowledging that they,too,deserve the absolute best version of true love.
It’s believing in the best and being unwilling to settle for less for anyone.
Neither is easy…there’s an old gospel song that goes “though there’s pain in the offering” and I find myself humming those words, and finding strength and assurance that whatever happens, love will be given and received and all will be well.
So I will let love go and I will hold on to love and I will see what God does with the choices that are made.
Because,after all,there is love in both and both are gifts.
Feel with both hands, Jeanna’