I love reading this. With a little broken heart . I am often the uninvited one. Years ago I asked some one why I was left out and she said, “it’s so hard because we feel like you miss out and we have to repeat and make sure the lights are just right .. It’s a lot of trouble and it’s easier not to have you come”
That hit hard and, for awhile, I avoided gatherings because I didn’t want to be ‘too much trouble’ but recently I decided that I will be the one to invite and include instead of waiting on others.
“Too much trouble”.
Not at all.
If you’re hosting something, and you find yourself going back and forth with “should I invite this person? Should I not? Will I be odd if I include her? Will it be rude if I don’t?”
My word, stop stressing over it and just invite the girl to come. Deep down, you already know the right answer or it wouldn’t be a struggle. Don’t be a jerk about it. You’re making it harder than it needs to be.
Not once in the history of ever has a person shed tears over being invited. Not once. But many, many eyes have needed to be wiped because they felt like they weren’t included.
I know it doesn’t always work out, and I know at some point you have to draw the line, but if you are on the fence and you aren’t sure what to do:
And if you’re standing in a group, and you notice a woman on the outskirts and you’re thinking “well, it would be so weird if I asked her to join. Better to leave well enough alone.”
Make room for her and motion for her to come over.
It’s far far better to be weird than rude.
Amy” -Amy Weatherly